The why behind it all

First of all, I am not really sure what sparked my desire to start a blog. But as I say that, I know that's a lie. I am starting a blog because I always want to talk (hence the can't stop part of the title), but it can be a little daunting to listen to me and converse with me, I am sure. Out of consideration to others and the desire to not be an over-sharer of my general thoughts (not of awkward personal things that NO one wants to know, I know what lines I shouldn't cross), I try to curb my talking. But sometimes when I have a thought, I want to share it. I could keep it to myself, but I think there is something about articulating a thought that allows that thought or idea to become more concrete and well thought out.

So one day as I was without anyone to talk to but was wanting to chatter away to someone about something, I realized that I could use the Internet as my audience. That way no one has to be burdened with listening if they don't want to be, but I could be "talking" to some audience like I wanted to. That's right, I won't the lack of a physical person stop me from chattering away (now the won't stop is explained).

That being said, I do find it a little awkward expressing myself to an audience that 1) may not even (or ever) exist and/or 2) may exist and judge me because of what I say. They may even judge me for assuming that I have an audience that will read/"listen". (I know, my insecurity about what others think is just BLINDING right now....and the confession of that insecurity is over-share. Whatever, it's my blog, I'll do what I want.) So, to avoid as much judgement as possible, its disclaimer time:

1) My grammar and use of punctuation stinks. I already know that. I like to blame that on both having moved around a lot and learning/speaking two languages as I was growing up. Because I moved so much, I have gaps in my grammar education. Because I speak to languages, its hard to keep the different grammar rules straight. Translating back and forth can be confusing. I do have reading a book about grammar and becoming somewhat decent at it is on my list of things to do, though. That being said, my to do list is a long one and becoming a grammar guru is not that close to the top. It keeps getting austed from the top spots by more interesting/exciting/fun/non sleep-inducing activities.

2) I ramble and I have a lot of asside comments (i.e. I cannot get enough of parentahsies). I also like to type and insert punctuation to make what I write sound the way I would say it. That goes back to disclaimer one. If the first two excuses for terrible punctuation and grammar weren't enough, then here is a third. That being said, If eel like this third one sereves as less of an excuse and more as a dispeller of untruths like "I had gaps in my education". The root of the problem may actually be that I rather throw grammatical conventions out the window and sound as crazy in writing as I do while speaking than be a proper writer.

3) I make no promises for this blog. I am pretty much a loose cannon when it comes to this, so good luck reading!